It's happened again! I opened the wardrobe, moved one coathanger aside and in a mood which can only be described as peevish, the wretched thing deposited my neatly ironed skirt onto the floor where it lay in a heap. I retrieved it only to find it had managed to twist itself into a mangled mess and, yes, you've guessed it, I have to iron the darned thing again!
Coathangers. I hate them. Stupid, good for nothing things. They're never the right size and not fit for purpose. And, to cap it all, they're more unco-operative and bad-tempered than a herd of camels!
You hang a top on one of them, where it perches precariously for a second, lulling you into a false sense of security. Then, just when you've carefully placed the hanger in the wardrobe, it flings your garment onto the floor with a contemptuous shrug.
There has to be a better method of keeping your clothes hanging neatly. I mean, we sent men to the moon more than forty years ago, we have the internet, ipads, smartphones, even cars that can park themselves. So, why, oh, why, in this day and age do we still have to tolerate the useless coathanger?
I'm a simple soul. I don't ask much from a coathanger. All I want it to do is take care of whatever garment I drape around its shoulders. Is that too much to ask? Well, apparently, yes it is. So, what' s the solution to all those crumpled up, ruined clothes lying jumbled on the floors of the world's wardrobes?
Step forward - The Intelligent Coathanger!
Imagine a world where you could open your wardrobe and see all your clothes neatly and safely hanging, with no possibility of them falling onto the floor. What a way to start your day, knowing you wouldn't have a last minute scramble to iron your crushed trousers before work. Surely, that would bring a smile to your face. And imagine if everyone had such coathangers. The entire nation's faces would be wreathed in smiles - even first thing on a Monday morning!
Come to think of it, Prime Minister David Cameron wants all UK citizens to be happy, so perhaps the government could fund research into developing this marvellous new aid. Maybe Intelligent Coathangers could be available on prescription...
Meanwhile, back to the ironing...